40 Years a Virgin: Why the Wait?! Promoting Purity in a World of Promiscuity is a mouthful! Yes, I am a 40-something-year-old virgin waiting for God to bring to me the husband he has chosen. You may be wondering why it was important for me to write a book about this.

As single people in this world, we receive many messages. When we turn on the TV, watch Hulu, Amazon Prime, Netflix, listen to music, or look at social media sites, we are bombarded by the world’s ideology about sex and what it means to be single. As a single Christian, the message many are spreading is for us to “test the waters” before marriage and it is seen as bizarre or crazy to wait to have sex until marriage. For example, have you seen the movie 40 Year Virgin ? I haven’t seen it and don’t plan on seeing it, but it makes a mockery of people who are waiting to have sex until marriage.

Additionally, as a disciple for over 20 years, I have a responsibility to share how the Holy Spirit has helped me to wait with an audience that may be searching to live a life that is pleasing to Jesus. Therefore, my book is a handbook for singles (divorcees, widower, etc) or married couples, who are trying to figure out how to navigate the world’s message about sex and live their lives according to what Jesus has called us to do.

Overall, I use my life as a tool to demonstrate how God loves us and my example of how to respond to his love. In summary, 40 Years A Virgin is my way of sharing my love for Jesus in hopes to inspire others to follow in my footsteps as I follow Christ.


  • I bought the book and later got Melika to talk about it to the singles ministry leadership team that I work with, because the book is that good! Melika talks about purity with a boldness and directness that are rare, and with a vulnerability that makes it real and inspires hope. – Rayola Osanya, New Jersey, USA
  • This book has inspired me to trust in God and aim to please him rather than my flesh…it reminds me that he is more important than anything we desire. I love how real you were through the entire book because we serve a real God so why be fake? Grateful for your vulnerability; the Spirit really moved! Please do another one! – Darnell Hill, Huntsville, Alabama, USA.
  • Miller does an impressive job in sharing her dating story with solid advice from the Bible about how to avoid some of the temptation pitfalls Christian women today face. A solid encouragement to all single Christians who are looking to feel successful and supported in their individual walk with God. – Valarie Johnson, Chicago, Illinois, USA

The book is available on Amazon, Barnes and Noble, and other online bookstores.

Melika Miller is a soul music artist, transformational speaker, Christian coach, and a licensed professional counselor in Tennessee. She received her Master’s degree in Pastoral Counseling and Spiritual Care from Fordham University. Melika was baptized in the New York City Ministry and is currently in the Memphis church.