Some stories begin with fireworks. Others begin quietly, with a single act of courage.
For Eileen, that moment came on January 4, 2013, when she did something completely outside her comfort zone: she sent Steve a message on DT Heart & Soul.
Now Eileen had always believed that men should make the first move. Reaching out first felt unnatural, uncomfortable and maybe a little daunting. But DTHS had only recently opened to Africa, and at the time there were no South African or African brothers on the platform. The sisters who joined often had to connect across continents, trusting God beyond borders, distance and uncertainty. So with a mixture of hesitation and faith, she pressed send.
That one message changed everything.
Their connection quickly grew into something deeper than either of them expected. But this wasn’t a fairy tale built on perfect compatibility; Steve and Eileen came from completely different worlds.
Steve grew up in a passionate, expressive family where conversations were loud, emotional, and full of energy. To outsiders, it could sound like an argument. To them, it was simply love in motion. Eileen’s upbringing was the opposite: quiet, reserved, and emotionally restrained.
The adjustment was not always easy. There were difficult seasons, moments of misunderstanding, and times when their differences felt impossibly large.
But through every challenge, God was patiently building something beautiful.
What began as messages across continents eventually became a real-life love story when Steve traveled to South Africa to meet Eileen in person. Their relationship deepened steadily through prayer, counsel, vulnerability, and intentional growth. In time, the two who had once lived worlds apart stood before God, family, and friends and became husband and wife.
Looking back now, they can see God’s fingerprints everywhere, guiding each step in ways they could never have orchestrated themselves.
One person who played a deeply significant role in their journey was Noeleen, the women’s ministry leader in Port Elizabeth. Eileen opened her heart fully during the relationship, sharing emails, seeking counsel, and welcoming guidance. One recommendation became especially transformative: reading I Choose Us together.
As Steve and Eileen read that book, they began to understand not just each other’s personalities, but the deeper emotional patterns they carried into the relationship.
Steve learned that when hurt, he instinctively counterattacked. Eileen realized that when hurt, she withdrew and shut down. Instead of allowing those patterns to divide them, they learned how to fight for each other instead of against each other.
Steve became intentional about noticing when Eileen was retreating emotionally, gently encouraging her to share instead of disappearing into silence. Eileen learned to step forward vulnerably rather than withdrawing behind walls. Their marriage became stronger, softer, and more deeply rooted in grace.
One of Eileen’s favorite lessons came early in their marriage: don’t hold onto disagreements longer than necessary. Steve had an extraordinary ability to move on quickly after conflict, sometimes forgetting the argument entirely within hours. Eileen realized that holding onto hurt only meant suffering alone.
From the beginning, prayer was the foundation of their relationship. During their very first phone call, Steve asked Eileen to pray with him. Because they had both been married before, they carried a deep desire to honor God fully this time. Together they prayed a brave and honest prayer: “God, if this relationship is not your will, then end it.”
But God did not close the door; instead, he kept opening new ones.
Today, Steve and Eileen have entered yet another chapter of faith: relocating to Perpignan, France, where they hope to start a house church. After years of prayer, conversations with leaders, and seeking God’s direction, they made the move believing there is purpose behind it. They are prayerfully waiting on God, as he provides encouragement through connections with churches in Manchester, Paris, and Bordeaux while they remain spiritually connected to the Tampa church family that continues to support them.
Their story is not simply about finding love – it is about surrender, growth, healing, choosing faith over fear, and about what God can do when two people place him firmly at the center of their lives.
What began with one hesitant message on DTHS became a marriage, a ministry, and a testimony stretching across continents, cultures, and seasons of life.
And their story is still being written.
